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One of my fave TV clips
Talk about attitude, social awareness, no-twitching, and a lot of disqualification
I cut the clip especially for you guys
Enjoy
Troy
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MY all-time must haves to be successful with women
a) Attitude, Beliefs, and Authority over thyself.
b) Skills, Capabilities, and Learned Behaviors
c) Social Awareness and Calibrating in context to the Environment
Post should be up in 48 hours.
Have a great weekend guys, I know i did =)
Troy
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I’m BACK, from my long hiatus. I have worked back to back to back for the past 3-4 months, and I haven’t been writing any articles or anything, so I’ve decided to commit myself in making some key articles and pod casts in the next few days.
I’m going to make this article short and sweet, and Its about some really important things that I believe guys should avoid doing even BEFORE thinking about adding techniques and new stuff to their game. I believe that if this gets fixed first, you will be able to have a very strong foundation to work with, and learning the Juggler Method (or taking a live program) should be a piece of cake after that. Alright, here goes:
DON’T NUMBER ONE
Don’t make verbal comments and not commit yourself
See this picture? This picture tells me there’s some potential to the interaction. The guy is basically opening a girl in a supermarket, possibly with a loud voice, and has caught her attention. BUT he can mess it up IF he keeps talking to her from that distance. Don’t keep that far distance, walk over to around 2 feet from her, and engage her in a real conversation. This tells her that you’re not just some random bloke without balls.
No matter how small the girl’s response is to you, it is still some form of initial commitment. Once you’ve gained that initial commitment, your next options are to:
a) Speak from the I-perspective
b) Use open-ended statements
c) Use open-ended questions
If you have been reading up on the Juggler Method, speaking from the I-perspective lets her know about your unique thoughts, opinions, and feelings. Simply put, it is her e-ticket to your reality. There’s an entire explanation of this in Wayne’s e-book, archives, and is all over the forum and blogs. A simple starter is to use “I feel like, I feel as if, I think that, I thought to myself…” Use the words “I” and “Me.”
I love using open ended statements because they force commitments from people. It is used simply by taking out most of the facts and allowing her to question you, or put the pieces together in her mind. It’s a very subtle way of making her make an effort. So, don’t be so quick to convey factual information! Hang your words, pause, tell her you love 3 things about this supermarket and give only 2. When she asks for a third one say “Besides the kosher peanut butter and the sushi bar? Its one of the best places I can find cute AND “responsible” women…” which will definitely open another window when she asks, “responsible? What do you mean??? From there you can definitely ask some open ended questions and escalate to a personal level.
DON’T NUMBER TWO
Don’t “Hover” around your target
This picture says a thousand words, and If you’ve been in this position, you know what I’m talking about.
Once you’ve gone a few feet from her, I can guarantee you that you are “on her radar” and she knows you’re there! So there’s no point hovering around without directly opening her!
The next time you see that attractive someone in the book store next to you, Instead of hovering around, walk confidently, with a stronger, but more graceful pace towards her. Walk directly. If it is a day time approach there is not much kino needed, but you are required to deliver your opener in a loud, solid voice that will “break her program.” And get her attention. Keep your eye contact.
DON’T NUMBER THREE
Don’t twitch when she doesn’t give you the reaction you want
We’ve all been there. You approach and open with your best f—in vibe, your eye contact is straight, you seem to be having an “on” night, and you get this…
Sucks isn’t it? To most beginners in this community, they would automatically constitute as a blow out. Well, I disagree.
There are basically 2 reasons why you don’t get a reaction
1) Its a vibe/first impressions issue or one of the problems listed above
2) Getting approached by a guy came as a shock to her, and she honestly does not know how to respond to that, plain and simple.
3) There is some reason totally out of your power that caused it (bad break up, someone just died in the family, or the traffic cop just plain irritated her today)
Whatever happens…
A lot of guys I know complain that some Asian women here in the US are quite “bitchy,” and for the most some of them just need a little “warming up” to get into a conversation. Use the tools above to gain commitment, and understand that no matter what size, commitments are commitments. If you can get them to say “yes” in the first ten seconds, you can get them to tell you their life story in thirty.
I remember when I first moved to a predominantly Hispanic city I kind of felt the same thing, but the longer I practiced infield, I realized it was just a woman’s natural mechanism to separate the Men from the boys. By not giving guys a reaction, they kind of throw them off their game, and for most guys they see it as rejection and blow themselves out. If you watch some hallmark male actors (Pacino, De Niro, heck even George Clooney) you don’t find any twitching in them when they get tested by women or AK-47 toting bad guys. Now, I know, movies are fiction, but that’s what you want. This is very similar to poker. It’s a bluffing game, either you do or you don’t call their bluff on it.
Fact of the matter is, women have more infield experience than most guys. They’ve seen this “twitch” every time they’ve tested a guy’s integrity (even in approaching). This could be compared to a “shit test,” but the thing is there is no need to even give a smart-ass response. You can’t lose a game you never even played in.
If you don’t get a big smile from a girl, don’t twitch, don’t step back, and don’t act like you just got thrown off,
Look, you deserve an answer, so if you just hold your ground, she will give it to you.
Free yourself from getting what I call a pop* (a laugh, or some positive reaction) when you open. It will free you from blowing yourself out. Continue on and gain small commitments. The girl is just “slow-to-warm-up.”
There you have it. This might sound as a negative presumption article, but I believe that these have to be avoided at all costs, even before you add more things to your arsenal. Hope you enjoyed it.
Okay, Q&A time, there have been a lot of questions regarding my absence on the Charm School schedule. The reason for that is that I am fully booked on Private Instruction weekends all throughout February and the second week of March. Update – Spring Break is taken. So, unless you guys can show up in DALLAS, TEXAS next weekend, boot camps from me are going to get pushed back to April.
Get with me on that through email (troy@charismaarts.com) and we can iron out the details and I can answer your questions. The way I’m getting booked right now, you don’t want to be late, and I am not kidding.
And what about Vegas? As you know the Alumni Super Weekend is coming near this April, and all boot camp attendees (Charm School and Private Instruction) are welcome to join in this fun and festive event. Wayne, myself, and the rest of the crew are going to be there and you can expect some high-quality presentations (trust me, I’m in-the-know) and some good times from Sin City. So if you’re looking forward to that, it’s also a perk of signing up this March.
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You’ve seen most of them in the Event Reviews. but really some of them are archived in our Alumni Forums.
I’ve heard, chuckled, choked, and appreciated all of them, (and loved seeing the photos! lolz) and I wish i could’ve archived them myself but honestly after awhile it isn’t much of a big deal to do so. Meeting, attracting, and dating girls is a normal thing. Anyways the success story today is from one of my clients from my past Dallas Boot camp last weekend. To you buddy, you rock! A few days ago he calls me and says “so, i have a date with this cute chick, she’s kinda new to town, and she has a boyfriend…”
First Question i had…”You got your logistics together?” “Yep…”
So he tells me the girl said something like, “You know this doesn’t mean anything, right? I have a boyfriend…blah blah blah…”
I’ve heard this before! ho-f–in-hum..
Gladly we talked about the reactionary twitch, so i said, what did you say?
He said
“Look, if you hit on me in any way, it’s on…”
She says
“I can’t promise anything…”
I call him today and he said..”yep, we had sex”
Apparently he really did have his logistics sorted out. He said that the key to it was that he kept pushing the envelope. They didn’t even spend much time in location 1. They headed out to location 2 (near the house), and from there it was game over.
Honestly, I get a kick hearing about the student successes more than anything. It gives me a high more than say, sports betting. I’ll write a few things here and there but for the most the event reviews section has em. Have a great weekend guys. Off to Toronto I go!
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I’m definitely getting myself a condo there. I love it! Anyhow just some archived stuff that were used last weekend…
Night game openers we used (2/2)
“I know….that you’ve been waiting all night…for a guy….to take you…” (straight to make out)
A money day game reward we used
“You should consider yourself lucky, that you met us, because we…truly appreciate you for your talents…” (referring to this hot blonde who was very entertaining — number close after instadate)
A money SOI we used
“not only are you sexy, but you…to me….are worth knowing…”
Field-tested over and over, we’ve used these last weekend with real good results. Email me and let me know how it went.
Troy
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Jan 18 – SLOT FULL – Toronto, Canada
Feb 8 – SLOT FULL – San Antonio
Feb 15 – SLOT FULL – Houston, Texas
Feb 29 – SLOT FULL – Denver Colorado
No gimmicks, no games, just a weekend of learning to be amazingly competent, and building supreme confidence with women. Whether you’re just starting, or are a pretty decent guy looking for consistency, this workshop is for you. Its 100% me and you. Email me for more details about this eventTroy@charismaarts.com
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I’m back! from my private coaching session in London. Despite the rising costs of just about everything over there, I thoroughly enjoyed my experience with the students. I’ll be back May 2008, and that’s a promise.
Alas, the kick-ass Event Review was posted this morning by falcon2008 and you can access that by clicking HERE
Just as expected, The Double Trouble Weekend sold out a few days ago, as I arrived from London. But don’t worry, for those in or around the Texas region who thought about and/or are considering signing up for a Dallas Boot camp, the next one is up, not too far from this one, on Feb 1-3, and that one has One Slot Left. You can click here to sign up for that.
More importantly, signing up for a Charm School Boot camp or Private Instruction RIGHT NOW gets you access to our Alumni Super Weekend in Las Vegas this April, where Wayne, myself, and the entire crew of Charisma Arts come together for an awesome special seminar dedicated to our Alumni around the world. It’s an event not to be missed. So, if you want in on that event, make sure to sign up on our boot camps before the end of March.
I’ve had some really positive reviews of the recent podcast I did on commitment. I know I don’t release as much pod-casts, but always expect some haymaker ones every now and then. If you want specific things tackled, let me know.
Another thing, people have been inquiring on my Skype address. No, it’s not a chat line or a customer service line for my services. It’s both. It’s a mini community wherein I can do free live teleconferences. Every now and then you’ll see me chatting around with everyone; all you have to do is add me and message me.
That’s it for now, looks like I’m off to a very busy ’08. Talk to you guys soon
Troy
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